Nice package

It’s been said that you should never judge a book by its cover. But in the world of alcohol, sometimes the packaging is everything. A label or bottle shape can be a reliable indicator of what you’re going to find therein — or what you won’t. In fact, a pretty good rule of thumb is that the more intricate bells and whistles involved in the packaging, the more deficiencies it’s trying to cover up (just like people with too much makeup or me with my stupid tattoos). But there are some bottles that ooze sex and satisfy our palates. Here are a few of our picks for the sexiest stuff on the shelves.

Haverhill Brews

The folks at Haverhill Brewery know that sexiness comes in all shapes and sizes, whether that means a gorgeous and shapely baseball-playing woman, a gorgeous and shapely dog walker, or a gorgeous and shapely leather fetishist. You get the idea. We’re partial to the gorgeous and shapely vixen who welcomes us to their flagship HaverAle brew, a light, creamy lager-ale hybrid.