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Saturday Night Live

The Lingerie Fashion Show

The Lingerie Fashion Show

Before I tell you what I’m doing tonight, I need you to promise you won’t hate on me. I need you to say, “Mike, we realize your job forces you to work on weekends and quite often requires you to attend elaborate events that sometimes you would rather... Read More »
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The importance of hobbies

The importance of hobbies

So, show of hands: who here has a hobby? You know, something you do during your personal time that you find enjoyable. And no, I’m sorry: for the sake of this conversation, masturbation does not count. (Ha! Look at all you fareaks lowering your hands... Read More »
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North End Newbie

North End Newbie

I move more than an overly caffeinated epileptic on roller skates. It’s as if I get off on the smell of a UHaul truck. Ah, yes, breathe it in. it smells of sofa farts and sweat, doesn’t it? That distinctive odor can only mean one thing: it’s September... Read More »
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Brunch

Brunch

Last night I took it easy. I had a fun but extremely low-key evening. So when I wake up this morning, I feel great. My exemplary Saturdaynight behavior has been rewarded. The allknowing hangover gods looked down upon me and said, “Let this man have a... Read More »
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Fight Night

Fight Night

Tonight I'm watching two grown men beat the snot out of each other. It’s a bit ridiculous. These guys are well into their 30s; they’re dressed professionally; they’re drinking in a fairly respectable establishment; and they’re pitching fists at each... Read More »
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Suiting up

Suiting up

I love to dress up. Calm down, pervert — not in that way. I’m talking about putting on a nice suit or a classic tux for a night out on the town. Now, you financial boys are like, “Dude, I wear a fucking suit to work every day and I hate it.” Well, guess... Read More »
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Figawi

Figawi

This week I’m hanging out in the land of crabs and bad fashion. No, silly, I’m not stage-side at the Squire; I’m on Nantucket for Figawi. (That’s an ancient nautical word that means “Shit! I just dumped my Bloody Mary on my sky-blue Lobster-print pants... Read More »
VIP?

VIP?

I’m a VIP. Or so I’m told. I get invited to all sorts of openings, charity events, and other soirées. I’m given wristbands that get me into the “real” party; I’m often given free drinks when I walk up to a bar; and yes, I’m the guy you hate who walks... Read More »
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The art of manscaping

The art of manscaping

Tonight I’m staying home to shave my junk. How’s that for an opening line? Did it capture your attention? It sure as hell captured mine. I mean, how could it not? I’m standing here with my pants around my ankles and a razor in my hand. Clarity, people... Read More »
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An un-adult barbeque

An un-adult barbeque

(UM, MY Saturday night kinda sucked, so let’s talk about Friday night, okay? Cool.) It’s 7 p.m. on Friday night and the temperature is 75 degrees. Fucking fantastic. Is there really anything better than that first warm weekend night after a long, cold... Read More »
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New car

New car

TONIGHT I'M doing something that I haven't done in more than eight years. Would you like to take a guess? No smartass, I trimmed my nose hairs just last week. Try again. Wrong: I eat at McDonald's almost every time I'm really hung over... Read More »
Ex-wife

Ex-wife

THIS SATURDAY night I’m having dinner with my ex-wife. What, I’ve never mentioned her before? Hmm ... thought I had. I mean, I’ve admitted to eating my own garbage and I’ve even shown you a photo of my hideous golf-themed pajama bottoms. One would think... Read More »
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Midnight snack

Midnight snack

THIS WEEK, I'm not going to tell you about what I did or where I went, because it really doesn't matter. The real story lies in what I did when I got home. No, this isn't going to be a sordid tale of post-bar sex or some over-the-top description... Read More »
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Inventing the Irish

Inventing the Irish

WE IN Boston like to think we invented Irish. Irish-mob movies have been filmed here in town. We have a professional sports team whose name and branding are all about the green. And we host what is arguably the country’s best-known St. Patrick’s Day parade... Read More »
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Girls' night

Girls' night

I SAT HERE for a quite a while trying to come up with an interesting way to relate my most recent Saturday night experience to you, my readers. I thought about talking about how lucky I am that my job has taken me to places that I might not otherwise... Read More »
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Best Body Boston 2009

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The Week in Party Pics

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