So … what are you?
Are you an accountant? Are you a bartender? Maybe you’re a mom —
or maybe you own your own business. And me? Well, to some people, I’m a graphic
designer. To others, I’m considered a photographer. I guess you guys would
probably call me a writer. And to my seven-year-old niece Erin — well, she
likes to tell her friends down the street I’m a celebrity. Funny, the labels we
gather over a life.
Tonight, I’m sitting in the back of a cab on my way home from a
fashion show I attended — and I’m thinking. Not so much about what
I am, but more about who I am. Am I the person
I’m supposed to be? Is this life that I have created for myself really making
me happy? Is the opportunity to be something really reason enough to become it?
Or, to put it more simply, does my “what” properly match my “who”?
I’m going way out on a limb with this one because I have to
imagine we all do this from time to time. We see something, experience
something — or possibly experience absolutely nothing at all — and suddenly, we
find ourselves questioning our chosen path. Are we moving forward, moving
backward, or just standing still?
Where do you guys fall in that range? Are you worried you’re
standing still? I used to be. See, I was married once. I owned a nice house in
a quiet town, I had a favorite beer and burger joint just down the street, and
nobody but my wife and a few simple friends gave a damn about what I did on a
Saturday night. But I wanted more.
So, for the past ten years, I’ve been moving forward. I took
every opportunity that came my way. I became a graphic designer. I became a
photographer. I became a writer. And, in the eyes of at least one super-cute,
always smiling, seven-year-old little girl, I guess I became a celebrity.
Well, here I am. This is where I wanted to be. So, am I happy? Am
I the person I’m supposed to be? Most of the time, the answer to those
questions is yes. I absolutely love what I do. I mean, how could I not? I’ve
met some amazing people, I’ve done some incredible things, and I’ve been given
the remarkable opportunity to bore the living shit out of you with this column
— an opportunity I’m clearly taking full advantage of tonight.
That said, every once in a while, something comes along that
throws me off my game. Maybe it’s a person, maybe it’s a song, or maybe it’s
just a familiar phrase uttered by that evening’s cab driver. Whatever it is, it
makes me realize that always moving forward might bring me closer to certain
things, but never standing still will undoubtedly lead me further away from
everything else.
Now, I realize this is heavy subject matter for a column more
known for fluff. But I just wanted to let you know where I’m at. I’m in the
back of a cab, on my home from a show — and I’m thinking. So, what are you? Are
you a nurse? Are you a dad? Are you the guy driving my cab? If so, thanks for
getting me home safe. In the end, I really don’t think it matters what you are,
as long as you go to bed at the end of every night content.
